a life of faith
It will be 8 months since moving oceans away. I kept thinking this is the healing I sought. While that is real and true. It is much deeper than a dilemma of healing and creative seeking. The commitment to move wasn’t a rush of a decision. Almost a year prior God had placed a burden on my heart to make my way to Hawai’i to help my grandmother. I ignored it for some time hoping the request would die out. Towards the end of 2023 the burden required a verdict and God is not a man you should ignore. I pursued the request in full honor and repentance and made my choice. I would take my daughter and move to Hawai’i. Even while planning out my move I couldn’t help but question whether this was an escape to freedom, a path of healing, an honor to serve, or an unconventional road to creativity— It is so human of us to want to know the entire plan God has for us.
A life of faith is no easy task. Abraham, Sarah, Moses, Daniel, Job, Peter, the woman with the issue of blood—the Bible is layered with stories of real men and women who have doubted, risked, lied, cried, prayed, honored and encompassed humanity while still holding on to their faith. What is faith? Hebrews 11:1 - “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” It is trusting God’s movement in our lives, being confident that He has and knows the plan for us. Therefore we can step into action wherever God is calling us.
Yet real faith takes its grind against our human philosophy and it isn’t always an easy embrace. Is God real? Can I really experience the sense of a living relationship with God? Here’s the truth: the embrace is not conceptual but heartfelt.
When God opens your eyes to see your own sin and its ugliness, and He opens your eyes to see the holiness of God, and He opens your eyes to see the looming condemnation that hangs over you, and He opens your eyes to see Christ and His all-sufficiency in dying in your place to bear your sins and live a perfect life to provide you righteousness— from that moment of conversion on you are living by faith in Jesus Christ. Hebrews 11 is the telling of stories of people who lived by faith.
By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in holy fear built an ark to save his family. (Hebrews 11:7) By faith Abraham, even though he was past age– and Sarah herself was barren— was enabled to become a father because he considered him faithful who had made the promise. (Hebrews 11:11) By faith Joseph, when his end was near, spoke about the exodus of the Israelites from Egypt and gave instructions about his bones. (Hebrews 11:22) By faith Moses’ parents hid him for three months after he was born, because they saw he was no ordinary child..(Hebrews 11:23) By faith the people passed through the Red Sea as on dry land. (Hebrews 11:29) By faith the walls of Jericho fell after the people had marched around them for seven days. (Hebrews 11:30) By faith the prostitute Rahab, because she welcomed the spies, was not killed with those who were disobedient. (Hebrews 11:31)
The legacy of our faith depends on the generations after us. That our children shall claim the promises of God even if we do not see it moved in our life. That is the core of Hebrews 11! Faith in Jesus Christ does not soften our trails, escape our reality of suffering or bring us into a utopia. The faith that suffers, and the faith that soars with joy and no suffering for a time— shares a common denominator and that is: God is pursuing both of them. It is the means of a deep conviction, the confidence, that God himself is better than what life can give and what death can take. God Himself, in Jesus Christ, is better than any happy ending story. That He is the treasure of our life. That no success or painful alteration can change that. He’s better. He’s better now and better forever.
So after 8 months of island living I question God in my devotion time again— was this move an escape to freedom, a path of healing, an honor to serve, or an unconventional road to creativity? I still don’t know. Maybe all of those and maybe none of those.
But one thing I am sure of——it is strengthening my faith. It is the means to the core of Hebrews 11— God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect. (Hebrews 11:40)
I am writing you love letters from Hilo.
I pray you read this with hope and love. With joy and expectation— knowing Jesus loves you but more importantly He needs you to grow up— in your word reading, praying, believing, hoping, looking for His return.
All my love,
G.
